Aug 28, 20191 min

Downtown Olympian Says Something Profound, Goes Unheard Amid ALL THE CONSTRUCTION

Updated: Aug 16, 2020

The Impotent Satyr

On Tuesday, August 27th at approximately 3:47 PM, downtown Olympia resident Ezra Staley spoke the most profound string of words out loud that anyone had ever dared say. Only, those around Staley didn't catch the almost magical sentence due to the pervasive construction noises engulfing the atmosphere at every turn. Ezra spun in a circle, hunting for any recognition from those nearby, but it was futile. The clever Greener approached a throng of fellow humans and attempted to repeat the statement again, louder.

"Hey," Ezra said, standing a foot away from the gaggle. No one moved. "Do I even exist?" Ezra thought. A scream erupted from their lungs, but simultaneously a drill droned on a block away. Ezra yelled the statement as loud as possible. A fellow Olympia citizen holding a cigarette walked up and motioned for a light. Without ceasing the thoughtful wails of unintelligible intelligence, Ezra fished in their pocket, unearthed a lighter, and lit the fellow's fag. With a crimson face and sweaty brow, Ezra finally yielded to the audibly overbearing attacks of the pile driver and went home to write the prominent revelation in their stairwell reviews blog.

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