Report: Funnel Jamming Drawer Yet Again
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Available on kindle, paper, and hardback!
Just start typing. Who knows what you'll find?
Also available as an
audio book on YouTube

The Impotent Satyr Jeez loo-eez. Can I catch a break while reaching for a slotted spoon? I'm just trying to stir the macaroni noodles I...


- Aug 15, 2021
- 1 min
Meconi's to Alter Name to McConi's, Serve Irish Take on Subs
The Impotent Satyr Thurston County's darling Italian sub sandwich shop announced, via a message burned onto thirty-seven hoagie roll...


- Feb 13, 2021
- 1 min
A Comprehensive List of Animals (I Regularly Punch in the Face)
The Impotent Satyr










- 2 days ago
- 1 min
CREEPER VANS | Off the Ankle Monitor
How does one send out the signal, "I'm interested in abducting you off the street in open daylight"?
With CREEPER VANS, of course!

- 4 days ago
- 1 min
What to Expect When You're Expecto Patronum-ing
You brought this creature into the world; you raise it.

- 5 days ago
- 1 min
Shart Through the Heart | Novel, Thriller
Impotent Products | Henry swore up-and-down that farts could sound like wet bubbling, slopping against polyester.
















- Aug 12, 2019
- 2 min
Diagnosis: 'Running With Caesars'
Impotent M.D. Are you or a loved one suffering from the hurtful connotations associated with eating an exorbitant amount of salad? It's...
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- Jul 30, 2019
- 1 min
Diagnosis: Kocher
"Gypsys, Tramps, and Thieves? I've been called worse--today."
17 views0 comments

- Jul 28, 2019
- 1 min
Diagnosis: Hellacopter
"My boy Zack is hella strong; I once saw him bench press a bench press that someone was actively using."
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- May 28, 2019
- 1 min
Procedure: VASEctomy
Tired of having kids but short on cash? Just stick your dick in a vase until it shatters, severing your vans deferens
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