Impotent Products
The Northern Air Temple is being overrun—EVERYTHING MUST GO!
It's the revolutionary kitchen gadget that Fire Lord Sozin doesn't want you to see!
We know that you only want to breath the finest, most non-solid air into your and your children's lungs. That's why we're bringing this state-of-the-art air blender out of Monk Pasang's fart-infested living quarters and are sharing it with the world!
One lucky customer who buys our last air blender in stock will also be receiving Monk Gyatso's best-selling cook book: '27 Vegetarian Recipes That Will Empty Your Bowels Before Midday.'
I am obligated by law to insist that you adhere to the operation manual and follow the manufacturer's intended use of the device, which is to blend air and only air.
DO NOT blend 1 cup bananas, 1/2 cup Kyoshi yogurt, a handful of Bacui berries, 3/4 cup plums, 2 Tbsp flax seeds, 1 Tbsp chia seeds, and 1/2 cup unsweetened air bison milk. DO NOT blend until no more solid chunks remain.
Knock-off versions sold in Ba Sing Se are ineffective and dirty! Buy an authentic Air Blender today!
