Gamer's Stairwell Aficionado

Mar 21, 2020

The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion—Vilena Donton's house | Stairwell Review

I've fought mudcrabs more fearsome than these stairs.

Feb 29, 2020

Watch Dogs | Stairwell Review

Why watch dogs when you can watch stairwells?

Feb 28, 2020

Sniper Elite 4 | Stairwell Review

They told me I couldn't drive my car up a flight of wooden stairs. So I grabbed my kar and then drove its stock into that person's skull.

Feb 5, 2020

Breath of Fire 2: SimaFort | Stairwell Review

More like peepee of fire. Never wade through dank pond scum inside of a castle operated by toads.

Nov 25, 2019

The Elder Scrolls IV: Skingrad Guard Barracks

Woah, simmer down, Sheriff. I don't know where those dead bodies came from.

Nov 12, 2019

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare (2019), Verdansk

I began the descent. And it just kept going. And going. And going. I thought I had been sentenced to reside in purgatory for eternity.

Nov 4, 2019

Kentucky Route Zero--Gas Station Basement

The mysterious Route Zero ends up, you guessed it, in the gas station attendant's pants.

Sep 18, 2019

The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past | Hyrule Castle

I didn't choose the green tunic life--the green tunic life chose me and not my bitch of an uncle that lost a fight to some weak

Sep 12, 2019

Spec Ops: The Line | Chapter 5: The Edge

I got sand in my crack; I got sand in my wind pipe; I got sand in my crack pipe. AND I had to use my AK. Needless to say, it was not a good

Jul 28, 2019

Hypnospace Outlaw, Gus's Heavenly Stair

I barfed, and it perpetually sloshed down every step like an unhindered, bilious slinky.

Jul 19, 2019

Old School Runescape, Wizard's Tower

2nd floor; more nerds; only three beds. Looks like Wizard stands for Wives In Zealous Advanced Relationships Doing it.

Apr 9, 2019

Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six Siege, Consulate

Gamer's Stairwell Aficionado Did you know that you'll get banned from the game for 31 minutes following two measly team kills? Oh, you...

Apr 8, 2019

Battlefield 1, Windmill Map idk

Gamer's Stairwell Aficionado Who doesn't love a good windmill? Song of Storms plays in my head while I introduce Jerrys to my trusty...

Apr 6, 2019

Call of Duty Modern Warfare 3, Resistance

Gamer's Stairwell Aficionado The last time I played this map online people used hacks and stood atop the roofs, out of reach and reading...

Mar 30, 2019

Condemned: Criminal Origins, Ch.2 different stairwell, boi

Gamer's Stairwell Aficionado I smacked the crap out a that dude with this pipe. ... That is all. 2 oiled up bum wrestlers out of 5....

Mar 28, 2019

Condemned: Criminal Origins, Chapter 2

Gamer's Stairwell Aficionado The police are looking for me. They want to steal my power that turns anything I touch into a deadly melee...

Mar 25, 2019

Jak and Daxter: The Precursor Legacy, Sentinal Beach

Gamer's Stairwell Aficionado Little known Jak and Daxter fact: the locals gather here once a year to sacrifice a Yakow to Boggy Billy who...

Mar 17, 2019

Just Cause 3--Vista Fonte, Prima

Gamer's Stairwell Aficionado I climbed to the top, grappled my own men to helicopter wings, and then started up said helicopter. For one...