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Trump says US and North Korea Had Direct "High Level" Texts

Updated: Feb 28, 2020

The Impotent Satyr

The Impotent Satyr was lucky enough to be sent leaked texts between US President Donald Trump and North Korean leader Kim Jong-un. The unedited conversation is as follows:

Kim: u up?

Trump: yeah what's up

Kim: I wanted to talk. I hope Im not disturbing Melania

Trump: it's ok. We sleep in different beds

Trump: in different rooms

Trump: in different buildings

Trump: in different area codes.

Kim: u should be more assertive. My wife isn't allowed outside the capital building.

Trump: things here are different. You wouldnt understand.

Kim: how about u open up to me instead of shutting down. I am an open ear.

Kim: Who's your little rocket man?

Trump: u

Kim: I'm what

Trump: ur my lil rocket man

Kim: were gonna be ok

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