The Impotent Satyr
The Impotent Satyr was lucky enough to be sent leaked texts between US President Donald Trump and North Korean leader Kim Jong-un. The unedited conversation is as follows:
Kim: u up?
Trump: yeah what's up
Kim: I wanted to talk. I hope Im not disturbing Melania
Trump: it's ok. We sleep in different beds
Trump: in different rooms
Trump: in different buildings
Trump: in different area codes.
Kim: u should be more assertive. My wife isn't allowed outside the capital building.
Trump: things here are different. You wouldnt understand.
Kim: how about u open up to me instead of shutting down. I am an open ear.
Kim: Who's your little rocket man?
Trump: u
Kim: I'm what
Trump: ur my lil rocket man
Kim: were gonna be ok