On January 17th, North and South Korean representatives met to discuss the future between their two countries. During the meeting it was decided that one Olympics team would be formed to compete under one Korean flag. One suggestion for the new flag was the score card of former Democratic People's Republic of Korea leader Kim Jong Il's perfect, all hole-in-one golf game, after which he immediately retired from the sport. That suggestion is still under consideration. The biggest news came from North Korea's Chief Negotiator, Ri Son Gwon, when he revealed, "our nukes only target U.S." However, when the translation was written out on paper and shown to President Donald Trump, the message read, 'our nukes only target us." Upon reading the telegram quietly to himself, Mr Trump pushed back his Oval Office chair and rose to his feet with triumphant gusto. "I've done what no other president has done before me. I, single-handedly, coerced North Korea to point their nukes at themselves. I am the greatest diplomat in the history of mankind."