Stories From the Satyr's Haunches
A sudden realization leads to the excavation and catapulting of another's areola through the air. As one does.
- Aug 30, 2021
- 1 min read
A Dan Moment
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A Dan Moment
- Feb 5
- 1 min
Embarrassed Coworker Caught on Fly Trap Chooses Death Over Asking for Help
"Believe it or not, while hanging from this adhesive tape covered in dead flies, I've found God. And She has a proboscis."
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- Apr 12, 2020
- 3 min
A Quarantined Stare: My Apartment Building
it's a pretty standard apartment building stairwell, kind of like this Charles Shaw Red Blend I'm drinking straight from the bottle.
358 views0 comments
- Mar 20, 2020
- 2 min
Pliable Teaser: Coronavirus Edition
This digital interactive teaser puts players behind the eyes of a shopper endlessly perusing an aisle that's void of any toilet paper.
24 views0 comments
- Feb 26, 2020
- 1 min
The Last Air Blender
It's the revolutionary kitchen gadget that Fire Lord Sozin doesn't want you to see!
79 views0 comments
- Jan 28, 2020
- 1 min
The Law Office of Ace Bandit & Bandit
If you or a loved one has been on the receiving end of an unwelcomed boop, you may be entitled to a large tennis ball settlement.
158 views0 comments
- Jan 11, 2020
- 1 min
Report: Cutting Board Still Smells Like Garlic
"But surely the odor won't latch onto this apple that I'm about to cut up, right?"
55 views0 comments
- Jan 2, 2020
- 1 min
Hydra Flask
Put on those water wings, because it's time to WET YOUR WHISTLE with the new Hydra Flask!
67 views0 comments
- Dec 4, 2019
- 2 min
Phil Collins Doesn't Remember Acting in Waterworld, and I'm Not Surprised
Genesis front man Phil Collins doesn't remember acting in the 1995 movie Waterworld, and I think that's the least of his problems.
189 views0 comments
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Was it a metaphor for our relationship? I don't know; I am way too drunk to psychoanalyze what she meant by "emotionally distant."
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- Apr 12, 2020
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A Quarantined Stare: My Apartment Building
it's a pretty standard apartment building stairwell, kind of like this Charles Shaw Red Blend I'm drinking straight from the bottle.
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- Feb 28, 2020
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A Quick Stare: Tumwater Falls
I was so happy to find some stairs that I didn't bother seeing the falls—I'd already fallen head-over-heels in love.
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A Quick Stare: My Viola Floral Studio
They said I could be anything I set my mind to and work hard toward. So I became a stairwell aficionado.
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- Mar 21, 2020
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I've fought mudcrabs more fearsome than these stairs.
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- Feb 29, 2020
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Watch Dogs | Stairwell Review
Why watch dogs when you can watch stairwells?
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- Feb 28, 2020
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Sniper Elite 4 | Stairwell Review
They told me I couldn't drive my car up a flight of wooden stairs. So I grabbed my kar and then drove its stock into that person's skull.
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- Feb 5, 2020
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More like peepee of fire. Never wade through dank pond scum inside of a castle operated by toads.
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Kingdong Hards for PlayStation 2
Donald, Goofy, and Sora fight the hordes of Hardless, thrusting and busting evil Dicney villains who use The Hardless like pawns.
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- Mar 24
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Stuart Belittle
The moment The Littles make their decision to adopt him, Stuart berates his fellow orphans for having been picked-over for a mouse.
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- Mar 21
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Flay's Hand Peeled Skin Chips
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Our employees painstakingly clothe magma-hot falafel in flannel, creating our trademark product: FALANEL
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