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WA Rep. Bruce Chandler Won't Stop Touching the Touchless Sanitizer Dispenser

Updated: Aug 16, 2020

The Impotent Satyr

The pleading wails of Republican minority floor leader Rep. Drew Stokesbary could be heard throughout the entire Legislative Building.

"Please, Bruce, you've got to stop pressing your dirty hands against the machine. It defeats the purpose entirely. People are getting sick!"

Mr. Chandler ignored the complaint and, instead, decided to recall the 1965 Pontiac Tempest that was his ticket out of Zillah when he turned 18.

Stokesbary's cup was becoming more tears than coffee at this point.

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