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Not to Be Outdone, Peter Requests Upside Down Crucifixion

Updated: Jul 19, 2019

The Impotent Satyr

Founder of Christianity and lover of friendly competition, Jesus Christ took a game of "one-better" between himself and Peter as far as the game could go (being crucified on the cross), ruling out any possibility of losing to the "Prince of the Apostles."

At least that's what the son of a carpenter thought until Peter marched down to the Roman Centurions and requested the same execution except for one small change--he had to hang upside down.

Scriptures tell little of the aggravation from Jesus at this point; most letters are quick to point out the forgiveness Jesus bestowed upon the centurions for allowing his student to best him. After the dust settled and Jesus and Peter had their laughs, the apostle Andrew marched himself to where his pupil and teacher were hanging out and requested his crucifixion be done on an X-shaped cross. Jesus and Peter mocked him and sent him away.

Disgruntled at their lack of faith but undeterred to one-up his jesters, Andrew went on to be crucified on his X-shaped cross WHILE sliding down the Jerusalem Mountain. His radical act became the basis for what we know now as the X-Games.

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