Apr 18, 20211 min
Impotent Products
Impotent Products is expanding into the food delivery market! Through online polling, questionnaires, and blurting out random thoughts that pop into our heads, we have come to the conclusion that American taste buds are ready for escargot, and our antennae are going to be at the forefront of this culinary movement!
We couldn't hide inside our shells any longer with this brilliant snail-delivery idea. Our marketing team has raised over eight-hundred-thousand cents to keep us afloat while we win this long snail's race to success.
Feeling curious and adventurous? Order a partially refrigerated crate full of these slimy boys from our website NOW! If your package is delivered to an incorrect address 10 or more miles away, we will grant you 4% off the delivery fee of your NEXT ORDER.